darn.
time to make the decision I'd been dreading.
which is funny because I'm looking for a job, so you'd think I'd be happy to have options to choose from.
maybe teachers understand this, but it's a deliberate thing to decide to take a non-classroom job.
usually it's because people are stressed out or overwhelmed...teaching can be challenging, for sure.
anyway, the question of the day: do I take a non-teaching job?
I genuinely love being in the classroom and am good at what I do, but had been thinking it might be nice to take a job that still had an educational focus but took me out of the classroom. now I'm not sure either way.
oh brother.

so nobody warned me that as they start moving, messes start growing.
pillows and heavy objects strategically placed over dangling cords, toys everywhere...
it's about time for Mrs. Lowing to head back to work.
Just in time!
i've been thinking that working moms need a little applause.
there are all these groups and stuff for stay-at-home moms, but where's the love for the moms in the offices? (or classrooms, in my case.)
the big one year mark is quickly approaching...outrageous.
it's time to party.

On a side note, I have found it helpful, as one who is currently abiding in the home of my childhood, to make the bed each and every day. Something I would have scoffed at in my earlier days. Trust me. It's far less depressing. Sure, I'm sleeping in the same room I did almost 30 years ago. But at least I have a very cozy and neat ginormous king-sized bed. (when your husband is 6'5", fulls and even queens just don't cut it.)

He kind of looks terrified, huh? It's still cute.
He actually really loves the swings, maybe he was staring at the scary lady with the mullet watching over David's shoulder.
Anyway, I've been thinking about how exciting this season in life is. And I never do this, but I am about to attribute my good mood to the current state of politics.
Is it because G.W. is about to be on his way? Perhaps...this has been a long time...too long.
I really just, for the first time, am super excited about this election - if only for what it represents - a change in the climate. I have my own favorite candidate, but honestly, if either Obama or Clinton end up in office, it would be pretty cool. Historical, obviously.
And I'm the one who always keeps my passport current so I can flee the country at a moment's notice. I have been discouraged about and embarrassed for our country one too many times in recent years. I am so ready for the change that this coming election will bring.

On the Move

as it turns out, when you stop worrying about something, it inevitably happens.
and he crawls!

as it turns out, nearly 12 months old is a little too old for not crawling.
anyway, we had sullivan evaluated and he qualifies for PT which he'll start receiving once a week, as soon as the doctor can get her act together and fax a prescription over to them.
he's already been more active - up on his hands and knees, moving around, no crawling yet, but all signs pointing to it in his near future.
when we first saw the cardiologist in NY and he questioned sullivan's quality of life with his CHDs, we were devastated....things have been so much better than we (or he, apparently) ever imagined.... still his words haunt the back of my mind, "always behind...", "under-developed..." etc.
blah blah.
understandably, the boy has had some significant trauma to his torso - I suppose these things take time.

always something to worry about.
granted, my son, after time spent in the hospital and recovering at home (unable to lay on his stomach) has missed out on almost 2 months of tummy time. that's like me being bound to bed for 6 years, or something...is that math right?
so I shouldn't be surprised that he's not crawling around yet. right?
you'd think.
instead, I find myself comparing him to the other kids his age....they're almost walking...
still he sits....rolls....sort of scrunches around with his toes when he really wants to get something. (usually just food gets him moving.)
anyway, I just want to have grace for him...instead I find myself getting frustrated with him and (how awful) feeling embarrassed that my baby isn't doing what the others are!!

sullivan and I just successfully completed our first cross-country trip.
we flew out to LA super-early on the morning of the 24th and took a red-eye flight that got in at 6am on Tuesday morning.








some thoughts/highlights:
1. My packing for the plane was in vain. A napkin and the people around were enough to keep him happy for a 5 hour flight.
2. He loved his cousins (and they loved him).
3. The change of scenery couldn't have come at a better time. Just what we needed.
4. I think a move to a more gentle climate is in order. I hate cold weather.

Anyway, the trip was super fun.